Thursday, December 29, 2011

Writings on the wall: & The Countdown Begins

Another year's ending, and for the first time in my life ..I'm nervous, just thinking about it.
2011 was a very eventful year for me. 2010 proved to be the beginning of my self discovery ..and the journey only seems to be continuing [as we would hope]. I guess the anxiety comes from not knowing what to expect, ..but knowing that it's going to be good.'s going to be hell. ..& at the end of that year, I'll be more of the person I was always meant to be. ..That's excitingly fxcking scary.

I'll be turning 25 next year [Jan.22 -woop!], so I had a pow-wow with myself to really figure out what it is that I want out of life. & how I plan to attain those things. ...I've not only decided but I've already begun to take action. & seeing my wishes begin to come true has to be the best thing in the world. ...I wanted a 2nd job so bad. However, I didn't expect to be working 7 days a week. [I was honestly aiming twd 6].
I thought I'd be half dead with no days off but I'm more alive than I was before. I love my 2nd job. I have great coworkers and there's leg room for growth. -- which is allllways a WIN.
[..wait, are people bragging about having two jobs these days? ..I mean, cuz I am! - I live in an economy where people can barely find one. I might need to have an "I have a 2nd job" party.'s that real lol]

I feel like confetti's going to fall out of the sky when the clock strikes 12.
& if so, I'll be the girl outside running around with her mouth open as if she's catching snow flakes.
I have alot to be thankful for. 2011 was fun, but it was rough. I had alot of down moments. Like in the dirt, DOWN. Broke, no money, DOWN. Dating was a shammm. L, after L. .. But I wasn't broken. & I'm not really sure what I went through that helped to make me so strong but I am one tough cookie. ...I did alot of crying though. Tough cookies cry too. ..& tough cookies believe in rainbows. & I've seen one after every storm. My rainbows were usually a situational change - from a negative to a positive. Some rainbows were people. Some were objects. Some were more spiritual.

So..2012 can't do ish to me but make me wiser.
My pocket's growing. Skin's bright. I smell good. Dress nice. & I have a heart made of gold.

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